The week that was!

This week so far has been mad! So mad that I now need a breather... and this my friends is that breather.
Let me go backwards now... Going forwards hasn't ever worked for me (whatever the case may be...hence!) I just calle Monsiuer R for the fifth time today... and this was the second time someone really weird picked up. I was spoken to in mad Telugu and then halfway through the conversation I realised it was his dad (prospective father-in-law it seems!)... which by the way was just after I came out of the movie theatre.
The movie I watched was Quantum of Solace avec the sooper hot Daniel Craig. Now I wasn't convinced that he was a good Bond till I saw the film, and seriously, kill me but I found this the most entertaining Bond Movie ever!!!
Daniel was RAW and I don't mean out shtoopid secret service! He was as man as anyone's ever been. I was shocked at the fact that I was checking out someone's derriere... I've never done that. Add to that a nice action oriented theme, some nice morale teaching story ideas, two hot women, one helluva madame, and you have the movie.
I was impressed, and even if I wasn't, I'll have to say I was, now that I've said it on camera. Caught on Candid Camera heh? Only difference... The camera wasn't candid and I wasn't caught. Let's blame my junior for getting me into all this! And yes how can I forget... Badekkila Pradeep. So he's a looker! And half of Bangalore's gay desparado is after him... but the boy is straight... seriously... and I'm not comfortable with gay men tainting the image of straight men when they 'really just want them to be gay so that they can have sex with them!'. Gay men in Bangalore... Grow UP!... Back to Monsieur R's dad. Earlier today after I had finished my General Medical Test, which by the way was at Piramal Medico Centre, right next to Namdhari's in Koramangala... I called him for the third time and someone picked up. I first thought it was his maid, but now I'm convinced it was his Mom. Do not blame me, how was I to know? He's never introduced us, and she began questioning me in Telugu. I didn't know what to say, so I said I'd call later, which is what I eventually did and already told you about.
Now back to the Medical Examination, which has been postponed for more than a week. It was at this vague place called Piramal Medico Centre (like I need any more 'mal's in my life!) and we would have lost our way, had it not been for Aviva's sooper sixth sense... Anyway after a mad hiatus and pick up frenzy on MGees at 8am, we landed at Piramal Centre only to discover it was nothing other than Wellspring. Now how do I who never goes to a hospital know Wellspring? Well, haha, the name sounds nice! That's exactlly why, exactly how I love Chevrolet because it's name in the francaise accent sounds so kewl... so we were in the clinic and then got on with our proceedings. The injections came first, which I must say were painless. God bless that male nurse with those stable hands, I've never had a more painless blood withdrawal.
This was followed by a pee-in-a-cup thingy, which was gross! All I was wondering however was how awkward it must be for a woman to do that. Men like to put their weiners into things, and so I'm quite sure at least 40% of all men are partially aroused when they see that small cup begging for attention. Gross images, keep out! Men are dogs and I am gay. So it's ok.
That brings me to the next cool part... Radiology. I was asked to strip very decently, and me did it, quite suprisingly without being one bit conscious about my pathetic body. I shocked myself. It could also be because the x-ray man (shit! that could be the next cool super hero name!) was sooper sweet and urged me on quite a bit. Then came the grossest part of the whole deal - the pathological or whatever test. I was first measured up, and nothing surprised me. So I am 5.4 ft something and weigh 74 kilos, seriously! I'll deal with it!... The next thing's what freaked me out. I was asked to strip again... and this time this over-friendly woman squeezed out blobs of cold jelly all over my body saying quite distastefully "Now, that's going to be cold"... and believe me that was the last thing I'd have wanted to hear...
To be continued...

நான் யார், இவன்-ஆ?

as sidey as I get :)

new wine in old wineskins!

The other side of it...

I’ve always wondered, as a believable and convincing representation of today’s Indian educated audience, if we expect too much these days. I caught Madhur Bhandarkar’s Fashion yesterday at FAME Lido on MG Road, with a couple of friends and colleagues from MidDay and DNA, and I was surprised how differently we all took to the film.
To begin with, I loved the film. It wasn’t fantastic; it didn’t make me think (for that matter no Madhur Bhandarkar’s – MB from now, film has ever made me think); and it sure didn’t make me feel like anyone’s representation was grossly wronged or under-done or even exaggerated.
I loved the portrayal of gay men and I think this is as refined a portrayal as we’ll ever get. Let’s face it, Indian gay men have been represented by the irritating yet quintessential ‘queen’ who has permeated into every kwalm of society to become the community’s much hated pin-up boy. The representations in two characters – that of Rohit and Khosla are two variants of this very un-ignorable pin-up gay man. They both represent typical ‘queen’ characters that we often meet in the pink circle on any given day, irrespective of the city one lives in. Rahul Arora played by Samir Soni was also someone who deserves much more credit. In a very underplayed and effective way he portrays a gay man, a 'bottom' more likely who isn’t convinced enough of his sexuality as yet. He does not have it in him to face society and come out, but still wants to lead a proud gay life. Samir describes and represents half of India’s booming gay community. Men from the ages of 18 to 60, who all face the same problem and can’t face society even though they’re convinced they’re gay. His boyfriend, Anshu I think, is another beautifully represented character. He defines the word ‘top’ with such panache, its hard for me (a self-convinced bottom) to not be attracted to his charms, even on screen. The lesser portrayed the better, and I’m happy the kiss was edited. It might have not settled in as well as Madhur had thought it would. Kudos to all the characters, all the same – for very apt and moving performances. As a gay man I connected and was not ashamed of the portrayal and in that itself I see the need for commendation.
Whether Priyanka was a good choice or not, is something that I shall leave to the other audiences to decide. I was convinced and did actually see the transformation from small city belle to big city glam queen. Most other viewers will beg to differ and I allow them to seek alms in peace. I am no authority on this one. I was however extremely moved by Kangana’s astral performance. I think that girl has what it takes to make a good actress. She just needs to be prodded the right way.
The other performances were minimal and forgettable, but Kitu Gidwani’s character stood out like matured wine. She seemed to be the actual diva and not once did I see a faux pas in either her styling, her clothes or her acting. She was the Diva in her own right and represented a lot of people who actually run the fashion industry. Powerhouses of etiquette, good clothes, better grooming and proper upbringing, who don’t think twice to shift from Sati Savitri to Bitch-with-fire-up-her-arse. Experience they say, experience.
The music was lovely, and the title track is still fresh in my mind, and that my friends is an achievement. The cameo with Koko and Shorey was so uncalled for, and so were many other scenes that just dragged us all along into a never ending need for self entertaining, whilst still in the cinema hall.
I must give it to Bhandarkar for crawling so deep into the underbelly of the fashion world and digging out these skeletons, but the real selling point of the film is in the realistic portrayal of the people involve in the industry. Be it the photographers, the page three bunch or the people involved in the glam industry, this movie let's one bake the cake and eat it.

I am fool!

The crushes have all ended.
That was fast.
Instead, I have a crush on a sweetheart from Bulgaria.
It's funny how you can fall so un-believably in love with someone you hardly know...
But then again, if they allow you to do so,
why not?
Crush 1 died a silent death.
Crush 2 might be ugh-ly straight.
and Crush 3 will only smile.
BREAKING NEWS: Romal, you're going to be single for ever...

But I've discovered Laya, and all thanks to Brother Bear 1, the DVD is now my solace.
Culture is my only hope. I will discover all that I need to. I will learn, express, study, experience and enjoy culture. I will have an eternal affair till the day I die.
If someone finds me in that process and the lord wants it all to fall in place...
I will be in love.
If he doesn't...
Then so be it...
The Indian Ocean and all that she's done to my race, people, language and culture, will be my never ending love story, for now :)

"It all ended even before it started, and I knew it would end. I am fool!"